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The Haddenham Herald Thursday 8 October 2026
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Lonely Hearts · Ref. 0063

Forty-nine. I have a sourdough starter I have kept alive for six years, which is four years longer than my last relationship and considerably more responsive. Seeking someone who will not be jealous, because the jar wins, it has always won, I have made my peace with it.

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Two more from this week
  • Seventy-two, and I now judge the entire calendar year by how far away the next village event is. Last week's fair was the peak, it is downhill until the Christmas lights, and I have marked the intervening weeks in pencil so I can cross them off without ceremony. Seeking someone to sit through the trough with me, no talking required in October.Ref. 0064
  • Fifty-eight. I have started walking the long way round past the gym window to watch other people become better versions of themselves under bright lighting, which I have decided counts as exercise and possibly as therapy. Seeking someone who will walk with me at exactly that pace, which is slow, and in exactly that direction, which is past and never in.Ref. 0066

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