Every story, as it is published

A record shine on Haddenham's glazing has left residents visible to one another for the first time.

Haddenham will go to the polls on a proposed secession to Oxfordshire and a single member proposed fortifications.

The Centre for Applied Behaviourism spent eleven days in the village.

Officials say the new duty is the first instalment of a long-planned levy on small comforts.

Ministers confirm the ballot paper will be eleven feet long, available in pictogram, and counted by whichever method wins the count.

Owner, 78, had been due at a retirement complex, a neighbour's boy is understood to have been on the porch.

The Chiltern Bureau of Ambient Volume has found Haddenham "dangerously peaceful" on weekday mornings.

Rival factions in Haddenham now hold separate screenings eleven feet apart in the same hall, and both insist the other is watching it wrong.

The Crown's kitchen office confirms one pan, one spatula, an eleven-hour standing commitment and a persistent rumour about the Sovereign's hands.

A nine-strong civic party set off for Saint-Pelage-sur-Ouche and held a full ribbon-cutting ceremony in a retail park outside Ghent instead.

Estate agents confirm the covenant on Nethercombe Warren transfers the basement servant with the deeds, and requires the buyer to bury him in the herbaceous border when the time comes.

Note reads, in full, ‘you didn't need it as much as you thought’.