The stories you kept opening

Colleagues say they had assumed the smell was ‘to do with the badgers’

Haddenham will go to the polls on a proposed secession to Oxfordshire and a single member proposed fortifications.

The Centre for Applied Behaviourism spent eleven days in the village.

The Crown's kitchen office confirms one pan, one spatula, an eleven-hour standing commitment and a persistent rumour about the Sovereign's hands.

The Chiltern Bureau of Ambient Volume has found Haddenham "dangerously peaceful" on weekday mornings.

Rival factions in Haddenham now hold separate screenings eleven feet apart in the same hall, and both insist the other is watching it wrong.

Estate agents confirm the covenant on Nethercombe Warren transfers the basement servant with the deeds, and requires the buyer to bury him in the herbaceous border when the time comes.

Collection remains Monday, as it has for eleven years. Which Monday is another matter entirely.

Over budget, landlocked, and thirty years late, but ready, we are assured, for when the sea finally arrives.